I’ve been sitting here for the past hour, starting a blog post only to find myself stuck after a couple of sentences. I’ve started a post about the menopause and how it’s affecting my body and my emotions but I just couldn't get excited about it today. Then I started one on body image. I was interviewed by a journalist yesterday for a piece she’s writing for Top Sante magazine, called ‘Is body love missing the point?’ I had a very passionate conversation about it with her yesterday, but once again I just found myself lacking inspiration and enthusiasm when it came to writing about it... what’s going on??? It took me a while to figure it out and now it’s clear as day. For the past 2 weeks I have been eating, sleeping and breathing OVEREATING. We’ve just put our Overeating Ecourse to bed (so to speak), and we’re also in the middle of writing a new book on overeating (which is based on the new overeating ecourse ) and we sent the proposal to our publisher today. All I can think about is overeating! All I want to do all day is open the NEW BOOK folder in my docs and write. I could spend every hour of every day writing about it and I’m just not interested in much else (well apart from talking about it, reading about it, working with it…).
I’m a bit like that with food. When I get a taste for a particular thing, I tend to want it all the time. At the moment, every time I tune in all I want is to eat is stew - doesn’t matter if it’s beef with anchovies (delicious, honestly!) or lamb with aubergines and cumin or sausage and red onion… it just has to be stew! Savoury, unctuous, tasty and meaty. That’s what I fancy right now and that’s what I’m cooking, every day.
So, despite telling myself that it would be good to write about something else because I wrote about overeating last week, here I am again. Overeating (and it’s cousins… treating ourselves, bingeing, grazing, pigging out, indulging, picking all day, eating too much, overdoing it…) lies at the very heart of our relationship with food and our bodies. Overeating is why we put on weight, overeating fuels our shame, guilt and self criticism, overeating is so often the one behavior we feel we have no control over. It took me a long time to be willing to pause, it took me a long, long time to take the risk of NOT filling every single empty space with food.
I used to wish that I had had Beyond Chocolate to turn to! Sometimes I wished I could have been a participant, not the workshop leader, I wished I could have been a member of the forum, not it’s creator! Thankfully I had Audrey to talk to, to share with. Her support was invaluable. I couldn't have done it without her and without every single Beyond Chocolater who bravely shared their stories and their fears on workshops, online and on the phone. And since writing Beyond Chocolate, five years ago, we keep coming back to overeating. Because it’s overeating that so many women seem to struggle with, more than anything else.
We can stop overeating, we can stop filling ourselves up with food because we are too afraid to allow ourselves to take a risk, to be big, to be amazing, to take up space and to stop putting everyone and everything else in our lives first and ourselves last. We can stop. Our new book (and the ecourse) tells the story of how it’s done. We can’t wait to share it with you.