Wednesday, 2 March 2011
What I ate today...
A handful of almonds, raisins and tiny little pieces of lavender chocolate, with a cup of Earl Grey tea, a ham and (lots of) butter sandwich, Patrizia’s carrots (delicious recipe from the south of Italy - for another blog post!), steamed courgettes with butter and cracked black pepper, half a tub of cottage cheese (about a fistful of the full fat, really creamy type, which I’ve got a bit of a thing for at the moment!), a few of my daughters deliciously hot, salty chip-shop chips (which we stopped off for specially on the way home from fencing club because it's what she really wanted for dinner) - just because I fancied them. That’s it. That’s not a lot really when I write it all down and look at it in black and white. That’s the thing about eating when I’m hungry and stopping when I’ve had enough. I don’t get to eat all that much. It never ceases to surprise me, even though I’ve been doing this for a while. The chips were a definite extra - in that I wasn’t hungry, they just smelled gorgeous and I fancied a few. The rest I was hungry for, I chose what I wanted, sat down and enjoyed.
Reaching a size that is right for us means stopping all the overeating we do day in day out. Not 100% - but mostly. I used to overeat all the time. As a treat, a distraction, to zone out, to give me something to do… knowing that I don’t do that anymore feels like a miracle. Knowing that I can sit with the desire to eat and not run away from it, that I can let myself feel uncomfortable because it will only last for a fleeting moment these days, is a freedom that’s hard to describe. Going to bed without feeling heavy and disgusted, without promising myself for the thousandth time that tomorrow I’ll start, tomorrow will be different… it’s beyond liberating! It didn’t take for ever to get here and it wasn’t hard. It did take effort and willingness and lots of courage and persistence. Maybe that's why I loved the film 'The King's Speech' so much that I went to see it 3 times - and would gladly go again! There's something about the amount of work, sheer effort and (bloody minded?) determination I witnessed in Bertie's (the King) attitude to mastering his stammer which reminded me of what it takes to stop overeating... It's inspiring... and real. I digress. Back to eating.
What (and how much) would you be eating if you ate when you were hungry, chose whatever you really wanted and stopped when your body was satisfied? Would you be willing to experiment today? Just for one day?
If you decide to have a go - post here and let us know what it was like.